Today I feel a lot lighter. I remember this time last year I was submerged with work and my dissertation on HIV AIDS. The one time I managed to go out with my friends was the night Ajo passed away. This was followed by numerous calls to Mum in a single day to find out whether the funeral proceedings were going smoothly. At that point I would have loved to be here, to have paid my last homage to Ajo but obviously I didn't have a choice.
I spent my weekend in Kewzing last week. The intention was to have 113 prayers flags erected in Ajo's name. The Sikkimese word for the first death anniversary of a deceased is Lom Chey ('Lo' meaning a year and 'Chey' meaning 'Cho' which in turn stands for prayer). I find it extremely important to understand all these terms. My generation, I find, doesn't have the curiosity with regard to one's own culture and traditions. It is like the case of a paradigm shift where you simply follow the rules without questioning them. Anyways, so we had the flags up and fluttering by 9am. Every family in Kewzing had sent one or two representatives each to help us which meant I had some heavy duty cooking to do. Sister-in-laws and aunties poured in from all directions to help with the cooking but I didn't allow anyone to touch the gas stove. I wanted to do this all by myself. Not for Ajo, but for me. To make up for my absence last year.
I drove back to the capital that evening finally at peace with myself. This one was for you Ajo. I know you will bear the results of your karma wherever you are. May you be happy. Always.
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