A good bargain

What is the difference between a sleazy reptile and the (supposedly) stronger sex? Not a lot really. Both have mastered the art of camouflage and both make the onlooker feel like a fool.

I watched a movie ‘He’s just not that into you’ some years back and guffawed at the Western concept of love. It seemed like the sole purpose for God putting us in this world is to love and be loved. Years later, I am laughing at myself. The truth is everyone needs some love to keep them going at every stage in life. Having gone through my share of unhappy endings and seeing my friends undergo the same, I think I pretty much have the right to arrive at certain conclusions.

I have a newly developed phobia against couples. What shall I call this now? People-in-love-phobia maybe. Nevertheless the concept of being possessive was never alive in me. So I wondered and then I realized that few men deserve to be treated this way. I never raised a single question mark in my relationship and where did that land me? So if that is the way to deal with things then so be it. There was a time I received some forty missed calls. Once officially in a relationship, the tables reversed. Today, I bore witness to a similar story which made me think. When we go through a break up, over the course of the next few months, we pass through various stages.

• Speaking from personal experience, stage one is where you are in shock mode. You cannot accept that it’s over. Those years of nurturing a relationship was a waste of your time while serving as entertainment for the other. 
• The second stage, that of break down, is quick to follow. You finally realize things are over, you cry in the comfort of your closest friends, you silently weep in the dark and keep pressing rewind in your head. 
• The third stage is of guilt. You question what could have possibly gone wrong? You blame yourself for the happily never after. You blame him for not having tried hard enough. 
• And then, the fourth stage comes along. That of acceptance. You accept what has happened and understand that moving on is what you need to do. 
• In the fifth stage, which may come after a few weeks, months or years, you experience indifference. After having gone through the previous four stages, nothing can bother you really.
• Until we finally reach the highlight of my blog. According to me, there are two kinds of Oh my God! One of immediate regret. Like when you hold a guy’s hand and go out for a walk only to realize the very next day that you didn’t like him in the first place. It was a momentary act and you go, Oh my God! Oh my God! What did I just do? The second one is something very close to my heart. Something I say regularly these days. It goes Oh-my-God (with long pauses thrown in between)! I was actually heart broken because of this man. THIS man! It is a happy exclamation (if there were such a thing) signaling thankful realization.

An hour long conversation with one of my closest friends made us draw an unanimous conclusion: “There is nothing called a good man but something called a good bargain.” Lesson learnt.